To Live Again
by Polarchica516
Summary: Story #4 in the "Picture" Series.
1. Prelude

Title: To Live Again

Pairing: Mi/L

Summary: Fourth story in "Picture" series.

Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell

**A/N: In the event that you are familiar with the original To Live Again-this is completely rewritten. Instead of a one shot, it will be about three chapters. The final installment of the series should be up shortly once this it is finished. FYI, I love all of your reviews-or being favorited or anything that makes me feel like ya'll like what I am doing.**

**Prologue: Fire, Fire,Fire **

When the fire truck pulled up to the Margate Motel, most of the occupants had been evacuated. It wasn't much as far as hotels go so there weren't many people that were standing outside in the summer night air. Donald Brickle was one of the fire fighters designated to get statements from the people outside. Mostly everyone just seemed to be annoyed but he noticed two people who were staring at the smoke with blank stares.

The petite blonde and raven haired male were captivated by the sputtering flames that licked the dark night. "Are you alright?" he asked them. "Were these your rooms? You were lucky you know. You got out safely and the fire didn't spread."

Donald waited for a response. The man was rubbing a small golden ring in his hand, the rawest form of anguish across his face.

"We're fine," the blonde choked out. "Can we just have a moment?"

Donald nodded before walking away, Maria turned to Max frantically. "We need to get out of here. They will think we started the fire."

"They took them. While we were sleeping-she's _gone_."

Max had just been saying the same phrase in different ways for the last thirty minutes. All he had to hold onto for comfort was the feeling of falling asleep next to Liz. She had been quiet and did not even say goodnight. He hadn't either-just made a mental note to figure out what was wrong with her the next morning.

He woke up, choking on the smoke in the room. Liz wasn't there. Even when he checked every corner of the room, all he had found was her wedding ring. Maria had flown into the room exclaiming that she couldn't find Michael. Then, Max knew.

They had left the ring as a message. We have her. We took her.

Losing Isabel had torn a hole inside of him that he knew would never heal properly. Michael and Liz-

He was ripped in two and his other half was wilting as the fire was now.

Maria had been staring at him for a long time now. "Max? We have to go. You already extinguished most of the fire. _We need to leave_."

Max was still unresponsive until Maria grabbed his shoulders and shook him. His eyes met hers and Maria forced back her own tears. "Max-"

Maria wasn't sure what to do. Even if they didn't agree with Max's decisions, he was still the one they looked to to make them. Especially the hard ones. She had never seen Max like this or seen this emotion on his face. Honestly, she wasn't sure if he cared if they got caught right now.

"Please," she begged.

"OK," he drawed out. The words seemed forced but Maria was appreciative for the response. He soundlessly turned and headed back to their van. HIs feet felt like lead and his heart felt even heavier.

Maria was worried as she watched him get into the passenger's side with zombie-like motions. Then he turned to her with a somber expression on his face.

"I know that-" and he swallowed a sob. "I know that I messed up with her. I know that I changed and she-"

"Max-"

"I can't change it. I _can't_ undo anything but I would have liked to say that I was sorry. That I would have tried to fix it. That none of this seems-I can't be in a world without her in it."

Maria grabbed the steering wheel so tightly that her knuckles were turning white. She wanted to scream but she knew Max was two seconds away from falling apart completely.

"Max," she began. She wanted to say something profound or comforting. But she felt too numb right now. She took a heaving breath and touched Max's shoulder gently. "There was a fire. They are gone and we have to keep is the world now."

Max regarded her sadly then looked out the window. "This is the world now."

And he cried.


	2. Chapter 1

Title: To Live Again

Pairing: Mi/L

Summary: Fourth story in "Picture" series.

Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell

**A/N: In the event that you are familiar with the original To Live Again-this is completely rewritten. Instead of a one shot, it will be about three chapters. The final installment of the series should be up shortly once this it is finished. FYI, I love all of your reviews-or being favorited or anything that makes me feel like ya'll like what I am doing.**

**Chapter One: Breaking Point**

**Three months earlier**

"Dammit, Michael!" and with that Maria slammed the door behind her. She stalked to the lobby of the no-name nowhere motel expecting it to be pretty empty at three in the morning. Instead she found Liz was sitting by the pool on the way to the lobby. Maria paused for a moment and considered continuing to the lobby.

Making a last second decision she went over to Liz, who looked at her suspiciously. Maria wrapped her arms around herself. There was a time where boy talk with Liz was the highlight of her day. Tonight Liz tensed up, readying herself for an argument with her former best friend.

"Can we just start over?" Maria found herself saying. "I was jealous of you. I thought this was like a fairy tale ending for you. Being married to Max and this whole Bonnie and Clyde ride off into the sunset thing."

Liz glared at her and laughed snarkily. "Where have you been all of this time? What made you think-"

"I know that it was irrational. You have every right to hate me. You didn't do anything wrong."

Liz stood up. "Where is all of this coming from?"

"Max and Michael hate each other. Although to be honest, I think Michael hates everyone," Maria joked. Liz didn't laugh so Maria took a deep breath and tried again. "Look, there's no reason why we can't be friends. I'm trying here."

"No," Liz protested. "I knew you didn't want to come with us. And you blame me that you chose to come because you regret it. That's not on me, Maria."

"That's the problem! When did you become one of them?"

Liz looked insulted. "And what? You think you're too good to be one of us?"

"No! I don't think I'm good enough!"

Liz recoiled, not expecting that response. "Maria-"

"I can't shoot energy balls or travel into people's dreams. I can't even get flashes half the time!"

That's because Michael doesn't let you, Liz wanted to say. Instead she went with, "What do you want, Maria? Do you want to belong here or not?"

"No, I don't. I don't want this. This is _you_, not me. I guess I've always tried to do what Liz would do," Maria laughed. "You've given up so much for them. With Future Max-with everything! But I can't give any more."

"You came for Michael."

"He doesn't love me. Honestly I'm not sure if I love him anymore. It's less lonely if we pretend though."

Liz went over to Maria. She had apologized and if Liz could be honest with yourself, the only reason she resented Maria was the fact that she got to be with Michael. There was no reason why she couldn't attempt to make this situation a little bit more bearable.

"Max wants to have a baby," Liz stated.

Maria inwardly smiled. Liz hadn't disclosed anything personal to her in a long time. However, her admission was startling.

"Is he crazy?"

"He says that he thinks that he's losing me. I'm not even sure how this will help. I mean we barely even have sex to begin with."

"I'll talk to him about it. If you want me too," Maria volunteered. "It might be nice to get some space from Michael. We work the same shift tomorrow."

Liz nodded. For some reason Max and Maria were the only ones who really got along. They both sat down in a battered pool side chair.

"I miss Alex," Liz admitted. A lump formed in her throat. "He never would have let us fight like this."

It was a step in the right direction for now.

**The Next Day**

Michael felt as though she couldn't breathe when she was this close to him. It was rare that Max and Maria had same shift days. Michael tried to avoid it-tried to avoid her. Maria had been extra difficult lately, it seemed. Although he did notice how Maria and Liz seemed to be friendly with each other this morning. Maybe that would help.

"I've been thinking," Liz said suddenly.

Liz had barged into this room and hadn't said anything at first. He had just looked at her, and felt the air leave the room. His hands were by his side, resisting the strong urge to hold her.

"About?" he urged.

"I pretend with Max. You pretend with Maria. Why can't we just pretend to be friends too? This whole not talking to each other _ever_ makes me sick. "

She smiled at him, hoping for a positive response. Instead Michael turned away from her. "No. You can leave now."

The words physically hurt Liz. Her eyes immediately welled up. "What?"

"I'm not Max and you aren't Maria. It's either nothing or everything, Liz. I can't handle anything else. You need to leave."

When he turned around, he had expected her to be gone. Instead she was glaring at him, her lips in a thin line and her body rigid with anger. "You don't get to decide that."

Her reaction made him smile. He had missed her backbone.

"I do. "

"That's not fair! Even if it was _everything_, you want it to be on your terms-"

"Shut up. Why would you patch things up with Maria if you were ready to end this bullshit we do here, huh?"

Liz was shocked by his anger with her. He broke his safe distance from her and was almost in her face. She wasn't going to back down. In fact, a bubble of anger was rising in her as well.

"I hate her because of you! I've hated my best friend for taking someone she never knew I had! Do you know how unfair that is? When Future Max came to me, he didn't know about us, Michael. That's what happen when we wait for the right time, OK? It doesn't come for 14 years and we never get what we want. Is that what _you_ want?"

He didn't say anything. Liz took a step forward and softened her tone. "We could die tomorrow. Max wants a baby-and now's a horrible time for that but that's what married couples do. I'm not sure I can even keep it going for that long but if I do-Eventually, Michael, something will happen that we _cannot _ turn back from."

Liz became aware of how close they were and a lump began to form in her throat. She was searching his eyes for anything other with the same angry expression. Maybe they had already waited too long. Had Michael put up such a wide wall to keep his feelings for her at bay that he couldn't take it down now?

Liz shook her head slightly and started towards the door. He wanted her to leave-she'd leave.

"No."

He grabbed her hand to stop her. His thumb ran over hers for a moment and Liz looked at him questionably. The anger was gone.

He looked terrified.

"Michael?" she breathed.

"Stay."


	3. Chapter 2

Title: To Live Again

Pairing: Mi/L

Summary: Fourth story in "Picture" series.

Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell

**A/N: The final installment of the Picture series will be up shortly. **

**Chapter Two: Where There's Smoke...**

**One Hour Before the Fire**

"I'm pregnant."

Liz observed Michael closely, waiting for some kind of response. Realistically she wasn't expecting him to jump in unrestrained excitement. With that being said, the lack of any reaction at all was more worrisome.

They were outside of another motel in the middle of nowhere. Liz had slipped Michael a note to meet her outside after Maria had fallen asleep.

"You asked me to stay in the room with you," Liz said slowly.

"I did," he affirmed.

"And we had sex."

He regarded for a brief moment regretfully before looking away with a shameful frown on his face. "This is the first time we've talked since..._that_."

"We fell asleep and I woke up to you telling me I had to leave before they got back from work," Liz whispered. She wanted to cry but refused to. She wasn't sure what she should have expected. To wake up in his arms? To have Max and Maria find them and have all this over with?

But not to be shooed from the room like a drunken one night stand.

"I hurt you," he stated and pulled her towards him. She resisted a bit causing Michael to look at her questionably. "I deserve that."

But he didn't remove his hand from her arm as she glared at him. She was unsure and behind the anger in her eyes, he could tell how hurt she was. "I've been so afraid to tell you," she sobbed finally.

Michael's heart was pounding. He had never meant to hurt her like this and it killed him to see her recoiling from him. He grazed her thumb on her arm and tugged gently. "Why? Come here, Liz."

Liz slowly leaned into him. "You didn't want me then. Why would you want her?"

She was still a bit tense next to him until Michael kissed her forehead. He couldn't contain a smile from spreading across his usually stony countenance. "Her?"

Her eyes met his. "Yes. We've connected. I can feel her. When she's happy or making me throw up everywhere-"

"I love you," he interrupted her suddenly. His hands cradled her face so she could look into his eyes. "I was stupid and scared. I just figured that I had to cut the string before you changed your mind and left me anyway. I don't know, baby, I just-I really messed up."

She was still not fully convinced, he could tell. "I'm done with this shit," he continued. "Max isn't raising my child or touching you anymore. We'll go in there and tell them right now. I swear-"

Liz pressed her lips up against his, kissing him fervently. His tongue swept her bottom lip. Liz moaned and opened her mouth for him. When Michael pulled away from her, he had tears in his eyes.

"What's wrong?" she asked breathlessly.

"I felt her," he said in awe. His hand rubbed her still flat abdomen. "You are never allowed to think I don't want either of you _ever_ again," he said to Liz. When she placed her hands over his, he noticed she had taken off her wedding band.

Liz saw where his gaze was and gave him a small smile. "I was going to tell Max _something_. I don't know what. The words never came out though. He didn't realize I had taken it off before bed."

Michael thought for a long moment before frowning deeply. "He won't let you go."

"We can't give our daughter this life," Liz said. "We need to keep her safe."

"Then we leave."

Michael knew the words were harsh but they were partly true. The Special Unit had gone through extreme lengths to recapture or kill Tess when she had returned. Despite her mindwarp that kept the agents from seeing them in the desert that night, they had never returned. It was because Max wasn't with them. They had probably looked for Tess a bit longer, then assumed she herself was dead after no more murders occurred with her MO. Michael had a strong feeling that if they left, his family would be safe.

"Max won't let us leave and if we do it anyway, he will come after us."

Michael tried to imagine how that conversation would go with him. Past history between Michael and Liz or not, Michael had impregnated his best friend's wife. That conversation alone made his palms sweat. Liz was looking to him for answers right now. While it may have been his biological obligation to protect his King, the woman next to him carrying his little girl were superseding that responsibility.

"Do you trust me?" he implored. Liz nodded.

"Okay," he exhaled. "I know what we have to do."

"What?"

"That day you came into my room you told me that we could die any day. You also said there might be a point where we just _can't_ go back to how it was. If we leave we have to make it so that we can't go back-so that he won't come looking."

Liz scooted back a little. A trepidus look was etched on her face. "Michael, what are you saying?"

**The Fire**

Liz was sobbing as she watched herself die. A death just for Max and Maria so she could have a life for her and her daughter. She briefly dwelled on how selfish this might be-how damaging this blow would be for what was left of their group. But as the flames danced, Liz felt something else.

_Free_.

She had watched as Max and Maria fled their rooms-panicked and heart broken. She had never seen Max look so forlorn. An engine roared behind her and Michael tapped at this window, motioning for her to jump in.

Liz prayed that Max and Maria had enough sense to leave the scene for their own safety before they saw that someone's car from the hotel had been stolen. Liz went over to the car, tapping the body to change the color and fingered the license plate to change the numbers.

She knew this wasn't the best plan. It left a lot of questions for Max and Maria to wonder over. Leaving two bodies in their places wasn't an option. It was the best they could do for now.

Michael searched her face when she got into the car. "Are you alright?"

Liz wasn't sure which feeling to pinpoint. The guilt welling in her stomach was nagging at her but the lightness in her soul was one she hadn't felt in a long time. _Free_.

"Yes. Let's go."


End file.
